Ok so you have been single for while (couples use your imagination here for me lol) you finally met someone who just perfectly aligns with you. You chatted a little and decided to go out for the first time for dinner. It’s Saturday your date is set for 8PM and you got a few hours to burn in between. So you get the hair cut/done you get your cloths all prepped and ready, you pull up the place in your gps so you know it only takes 20 minutes to get there. The awesome date mentioned that they been stood up before and it’s one of the things they hate the most, so to be mindful you plan to get there a minute or two early. Ok the times has arrived, you get dressed, put on your cloths, triple check yourself in the mirror and begin to drive. You get on the highway, traffic is flowing smoothly, and then Bam! it happens.
As you go around a bend, brake lights eclipse the highway. As far as the eye can see, cars are at a complete stop, and even a few people are outside of their cars. As you slam your brakes barely stopping in time, you quickly look in the rear view to make sure you don’t get rare ended. As they stop just in time, you once again look down the line of cars. “No no no no no…” You say to yourself. Quicky grabbing your phone you go to call history and dial their name. You put the phone to your ears only to hear a beeping tone. “The heck”you glance back down at the screen, no signal. “Got to be kidding me!” You glance at the cars next to you, quickly putting down your window, you signal them to do the same and then yell “excuse me, do you have any signal?” You wave your phone around to signal what you meant. The driver next to you grabs their phone from their pocket and nods their head signaling no. “Really!” You think to yourself, “A dead zone still existing in 2013! And I happen to be in the center of it! No ones going to believe this..” As you sit there, time and the perfect relationship you carved out in your mind just begins to slowly drift away. You then begin to think to yourself “Maybe it wasn’t meant to be, this has to be a sign!” When traffic finally gives up you slowly drive by the meeting place, shamelessly hoping the person already left, and they have.
We can all agree that life throw curve balls at us, heck even a few bricks. Just when everything seems to be getting back on track, another thing comes crashing into our lives. Anything from bills, car trouble, layoffs, family, friends, you name it, it can happen, and at the worst possible time.
The phrase “Life is defined not by what happens to you, but how you react to it!” Comes to mind. There is going to be allot of things that takes us off course of archiving our goals, and the crazy part is most of the time we aren’t even aware of it! Flying through life on autopilot, we at times just unconsciously react to most circumstances and events, and most of the time the habitual response isn’t aligned with our goals.
With all that said, here are a few things I’ve picked up over the years to help stay on course.
1.Pain is temporary
No matter how crazy the situation, 98% of the time it is temporary. I live a pretty stress free lifestyle, and here is why: I control the things I can, and the things that are out of my control, I don’t put energy in to. I acknowledge that it’s there, or that it has happened, and then I push forward. It’s no use dwelling on the rain, or the lack of sunlight. Most of the time uncontrollable things only last for a while anyway.
Regardless of where you are now or were you came from, you have the ability to decide where you want to be a minute from now, an hour, tomorrow, next week and so on. Disengage auto pilot and grab the control stick! This spaceship of life will go anywhere you direct it.
3. Ride the waves and not the currents!
This idea came to me while driving to work, there are so many “moments of opportunities” on the road that for most people the drive alone to work can define their day.
Moments of opportunities: The moment in which you have the opportunity to react positively to an event, in which you would normally react negatively towards.
Yeah those moments! people cutting you off, slow person in the fast lane, yep all of those. Negative interactions can be like a current, quickly sweeping you to immanent doom. Recognize this reaction, and break away from that current.
On to riding the waves, if you have ever seen a surfer attacking those giant waves, elegantly cutting through its monstrous curves, you will probably observe something. He or she is on top of the world within that moment! The heightened senses and chemicals running through the bloodstream creates a natural high, and surfers will work at it night and day in preparation, just to be able to ride that wave as long as they possibly can.
Be a life surfer! when you are having a beautiful day, or that awesome interaction, you ride that wave until it’s humanly possible not to. Keep the smile going, think back to it a few hours later, and smile again! You wont always remember what was said or done, but you will remember how you feel. Carry that joy with you, share it, take a picture, record a video, and ride that wave!
4. Don’t take it personal.
Most of the time people have positive intentions, and most of the time, your perception of what they say or do when it comes to sharing criticism towards you, will not be as positive. It’s not entirely their fault. It’s actually a developed skill to be able to give both impactful and positive advice or criticism and not many people master this. When ever someone provide feedback, listen to them, assume positive intent and Chose (keyword) what you accept and adopt. Don’t just autopilot into an emotional response or judgement.
Same thing when crazy things happens to you, don’t take it personal, acknowledge, learn what lessons you can and then keep it moving.
5. Lead, don’t follow.
Going back to the driving analogy, when you have the open road in front of you, you then control the speed at which drive at, however if you are behind someone, then you can only go as fast as the car in front of you. If you drive like I do, then you might also be obsessed with the open road. Pace cars, as I call them will only slow you down. There are small occasions in which you drive behind someone who is going at just the right speeds, breaks at the right moments and just seem one with the road, in these cases I don’t mind following, in these same rare occasions you will find mentors in life who is heading in the direction in which you are wishing to travel. Learn as much as you can from these people, and when the open road presents itself, feel free to press that gas pedal.
6. Perception is reality
You have probably heard this phrased tossed around countless times, what does it mean to you?
Let’s take a step back and think about an abstract painting, so you see this painting, and to you it looks like a boy throwing a ball. Every time you see that painting your think “O there is that painting of the boy throwing the ball” then one day someone overhears you thinking out loud and they say “mmm I can see why you think that, but it’s actually an old man looking up at the moon. I know the painter and even though he gets allot of different opinions on what it is, he assures me It’s an old man looking up at the moon.” “o wow” you say to yourself as the picture in front of you transforms from a boy throwing a ball to an old man looking up at the moon. “I see it now!”
Life works the exact same way, the way we view people or events, makes them real, from our specific perception. Regardless of what or who they are, the way they exist in our reality is the way we perceive them. And unless your perception is altered by introducing a new idea or more observation, it will remain as such in our experience.
With all this said, I challenge you all to take a step back and look at the painting of life from a different perspective, I challenge you to learn the lessons that might be within our “moments of opportunity” and I challenge you to have more “moments of opportunity” in contrast to annoying or painful ones. I also challenge you to more often challenge yourself. You will soon realize that as you learn and grow, you will intern become a more amazing version of you!
Till next time friends.
~Born for Greatness! Live to become Legendary!~